Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Gingerdead Man 3: Saturday Night Cleaver (2011)

Director: William Butler, Silvia St. Croix

Stars: Jacqui Holland, Jean Louise O'Sullivan, Mike C. Manning

The Gingerdead man is locked up in a prison for bad pastry. A group breaks in to release the food and let them be free. The cookie escapes and ends up going back in time to 1976 at a roller disco were he can keep on killing.

This movie ripped off several other movies. The whole prison scene at the beginning was from Silence of the Lambs. They redid the scene from Porky's when the penis was in the hole in the shower wall. Most of the movie and the subtitle is from Saturday Night Fever. This chapter was the worse out of all of them. Watch if there is no paint drying or dogs to brush.

 Gingerdead Man 3: Saturday Night Cleaver Trailer

Monday, April 10, 2017

Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust (2008)

Director: Silvia St. Croix

Stars: Michelle Bauer, Pieter Christian Colson, Michael Deak                        

This little big cookie is back to kill again. I just typed that. I know. This time we are at Cheatum Studios, a low budget movie company, who is filming their new horror movie involving puppets.  What is the deal with puppets? Away, a woman brings in doughnuts for the crew, and you guessed it, the cookie killer is in the box. He wants to live and kill again. The puppets come to life to help in a way. It's bad.

The subtitle for the movie is funny and new too bad the movie was not. One of the puppets is a dildo. You read that right, a dildo. The movie is filled with bad acting, but it is better than the first one. Just bad.
 Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust Trailer

Saturday, April 8, 2017

Thankskilling 3 (2012)

Director: Jordan Downey

Stars: Daniel Usaj, Joe Hartzler, Preston Altree                        

The fowl-mouthed villain Turkie is back and hacking his way to find the last copy of "ThanksKilling 2" which has landed in the hands of a group of disturbingly crude puppets. The death toll rises as Turkie carves through the likes of Flowis the rapping grandma, Rhonda the bisexual space worm, Yomi the puppet in search of her mind, and their equally ridiculous friends who all travel through fantastical settings such as the Feather World and Turkey Hell. With the guidance of Uncle Donny, the wig-wearing inventor of the Pluck Master 3000, Jefferson, Head of Security at Thanksgiving Land, and a Wise Turkey, the gatekeeper to the Feather World, our collection of raunchy characters hope to fend off the murderous rampage of Turkie, all while trying to help Yomi find her mind.

There never was a part 2.  According to the movie it was that bad.  This one is better than the first one which is not saying much at all.  This time we get more puppets! They are cheaper than actors.  A lot of toilet humor and raunchy, but not really in a good way.  I do not recommend watching this, but I cannot control you, so if you must.
Thankskilling 3 (2012) Trailer

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Smiley (2012)

Director: Michael J. Gallagher

Stars: Caitlin Gerard, Melanie Papalia, Shane Dawson

It's Ashley's first year of college.  Instead of living in the dorms, she rents a room from another female student, Proxy.  The two girls quickly become friends, and the first night attend a house party nearby of an on-line community that Proxy is a member.  Ashley gets friendly and drunk with the party members, but while there she witness a murder on this community website.  The site is a random video chat service.  Is the murder real or not, no one seems to know.  The killer is an urban legend known as Smiley.  It is based on the same principle as Bloody Mary.

Thinking that the murder as faked to prove themselves right the two girls decide to try it for themselves.  After picking a random person, Smiley shows up behind the person and stabs them to death.  Ashley goes a bit crazy, and Proxy is not dealing with her well.  Smiley comes after Ashley in real life.

I'm not going to spoil the movie, and that is not hard to do.  The movie is not terrible, but it needs some work.  I'm just glad it is something new added to the horror genre and not the same old tired plot.  The ended was pretty good, and yes, there is going to be a sequel.  What movie doesn't get a sequel nowadays. Watch if you must.  The movie runs a bit slow.

 Smiley (2012) Trailer

Friday, February 24, 2017

It's Alive (2008)

Director: Josef Rusnak

Stars: Bijou Phillips, James Murray, Raphaël Coleman                         
Lenore Harker, Bijou Phillips, is dropping her Graduate program to have a baby with her boyfriend.  Frank Davis, James Murray, is the boyfriend whom just lost his parents in a car accident and left his little brother Chris handicap.  All three people are living in Frank's parents house.  Soon after Lenore moves in the house she goes in to early labor.  At the hospital the baby kills the entire medical staff in the delivery room.  The police believe someone else was in the room that caused the killings.

Once they get their baby home, Lenore notices changes in the baby.  The baby has grown  and developed more than a normal baby should.  The baby starts getting out of the crib and eating animals alive.  When any visitor to the house shows up, they get attacked as well.

This movie is a remake of the original 1974 version.  They keep the names the same.  The one thing that they never brought up in the movie was the look of the baby.  It showed the baby's face and hands.  I do not have children, and I do not plan on it.  I have been around lot of babies, and I know what they look like.  I have never seen a baby with sharp teeth and claws.  Maybe I just haven't seen one yet.  This man looks at his baby and sees nothing wrong with the baby's appearance.  Never even makes a comment, and neither does the mother.  Her ends up going nuts and protecting the little monster from hard.

It is better than the original movie, but that is not saying much.  It has some bloody scenes but not a lot of gore or scary scenes.  That's all I!

 It's Alive (2008) Trailer

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Insidious (2010)

Director:  James Wan

Stars: Patrick Wilson, Rose Byrne, Ty Simpkins, Barbara Hershey

Josh and Renai Lambert move into a new house with their children. As soon as they start to settle in the house in objects have been moved or misplaced.  Their son, Dalton, was looking around the attic and fell then slipped in a coma.  Renai, Rose Byrne, was experiencing more disturbances in the house being left in the house alone at night.  Josh, Patrick Wilson, is a teacher and keeps away from the house.  They move to another house thinking that the house was haunted, but there are still problems in the new house.  Josh's Mom, Barbara Hershey, intervenes and brings a medium over to help the family with their problem.

It seems that their son can astral project but does know that he is doing it.  From doing this he has become lost in a realm called the Further.  There are other spirits keeping him from getting back to his body.  The family has to figure out how to save their son.

I know this sounds a bit odd for a moved, but it is really well done.  It was actually creepy in parts of the movie.  I was not expecting much at all, but I was pleasantly surprised at the script and the acting portrayed.  I do not want to give anything away, so this one is a little short.  If you have not watched it yet, then I think that you should.

 Insidious (2010) Trailer

Monday, February 6, 2017

The Possession (2012)

Director: Ole Bornedal

Stars: Natasha Calis, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Kyra Sedgwick, Grant Show

Stephanie and Clyde are recently divorced and trying to keep a normal life for their two daughters, Em and Hannah.  Stephanie, Kyra Sedgwick, has started to move on with her life by dating Brett, Grant Show.  Clyde, Jeffery Dean Morgan, is still hoping that they will get back together, but he buys a new house so the girls will have more room when staying with him.  The girls get their dad to stop at a yard sales they are driving pass.

The youngest daughter, Em, finds a wooden box that she wants.  The box contains a powerful spirit that takes over her body and now her family must fight to get her soul back.

The beginning of the movie sets up what will be happening throughout the movie.  You get to watch a girl slowing bring taken over by a Jewish evil spirit.  It did not know there was a difference in spirit and their religious background, but I could be wrong.  It is better than the other exorcism film of the past ten years. The acting was well done for a horror movie, one never expects too much from horror movies.  The special effects are pretty good.  The movie is not scary or chilling, but it is still a good movie.  It's simple and to the point.
The Possession (2012) Trailer